EPST/OAA

Hier te vinden:

1) Hoe verloopt de opleiding (opleidingsstructuur)

2) Fav. uitspraken leraren OAA

3) Fav. uitspraken studenten OAA

1) Hoe verloopt de opleiding (opleidingsstructuur)

Allereerst

Utrecht - Nederland

Aanmelding, selectie en keuringen.
Je schrijft je in voor een presentatie avond voor het zogenaamde 'Europilot Program', dit kan gewoon via de website (http://www.epst.nl/nl/avonden.htm). De meeste van je vragen worden al beantwoord tijdens de presentatie die gehouden word op die avond, mocht je nog andere vragen hebben dan kan je die daar uiteraard allemaal stellen.
Aan het eind van die presentatie avond krijg je formulieren mee die je (eventueel direct) kan invullen om je te kunnen laten deelnemen aan de zgn. 'Compass test', een test welke je succesvol moet afronden om de opleiding te mogen beginnen. De test bestaat uit allerlei onderdelen waaronder: *Hand/voet/oog coördinatie *Engelse taalbeheersing *Wiskunde (hoofdrekenen/etc.) *Geheugentest *Oriëntatie *e.d. (http://www.epst.nl/nl/compass.htm).
Heb je de 'Compass test' succesvol afgelegd dan ga je door naar 2 dagen van verschillende individuele tests en groepstests. Op de laatste dag zul je je motivatie moeten vertellen tijdens een 'interview' met twee (ex)vliegers, niet onbelangrijk.

Na aanname bij EPST

Oxford Aviation Academy deel 1 (groundschool) - England

Groundschool = theorie. 14 studieboeken/-pillen en schoolexamens + JAR-examens. Minimaal 85% tot maximaal 100% score behalen (zegge, cijfers a 8,5 tot 10)

Na behalen groundschool OAA

Goodyear - United States of America

Vliegen onder goede omstandigheden (ala idyllisch)

Na afronding in Goodyear

Oxford Aviation Academy deel 2 (flying) - England

Vliegen onder minder goede omstandigheden (minder idyllisch maar toch idyllisch haha)

Na afronding OAA deel 2

Utrecht - Nederland

Afronding, cursussen (Nijenrode) en dergelijke

2) Fav. uitspraken leraren OAA [leraren hebben in het bijzonder iets tegen helikopters en Airbus']

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* Helicopters actually can't fly. They're so ugly that the Earth is rejecting them
* You do not have to wear ear protection if applying for a helicopter license, helicopters are so noisy you will get deaf anyway

* We can either fly a proper aircraft, or an Airbus

* Flying an Airbus is just like playing on your Game-Boy
* In an Airbus you get a Game-Boy for nose wheel steering!
* Tataraataa, running down the runway

* Lovin’ it a lot

* It’s God stuff

* All Dutch wear Clogies and live in Windmills between two meter high dikes

* Instruments are like woman, they always lie

* It looks like a dance you'd do in de club or disco, suck, squeeze, bang, blow

* Uhm, Bananas. (when you ask the teacher a question to get to know stuff which does not really matter)

* In Amerika they work with Inches of Mercury, we work with hecto-Pascals because we really know stuf and they do not.

* Stupid foreigners

* Yeah, playing the game (some teachers refer to flying as it is a game)

* It does not take an Einstein to figure what happens

* Farting in front of the classroom and knowing for sure the odor will ascent, follow the sealing, and descent in the middle of the classroom, that is meteorology, is it not?

* I make loads of promises, you can ask one of my wives !
* You do not want to become pilots, you want to become air men! So put that information inside your air men-box.
* CAA: Campaign Against Aviation
* In aviation, people tent to abbreviate everything into 3 letters! They [you know, they] even have a abbreviation abbreviating a 3 letter abbreviation, that abbreviation is: TLA, 'Three Letter Abbreviation'.
*[when talking about airplane parts] These things cost an arm and a leg!
*[talking about hydraulic failure] When an overpressure occurs, the release-valve will simply dump the excess hydraulic fluid over Slough!
* Thrust and drag is PPL shit, we talk about thrust required.
* In the second world war, when you basterds were not born yet, we used to ..blablabla..
* I am suffering from verbal diarrhea, so you guys will have to remind me of stuff some times
* So, when aging, all of your muscles will become harder progressively and therefor less movable. At my age [around 65yrs] everything I would want to be soft becomes hard and the only thing I would want to become hard sometimes does not anymore!
*[resulting out of above mentioned sentence] I am on viagra now and I tend to use it on cruise-ships, it will prevent me from rolling of my bed during the nights.
* Mister Benouilli has left the building
* They do not call it the 'COCKPIT' anymore, since more and more ladies enter the profession of pilot.
*[when talking about Isobars, a subject which is not particularly easy] Isobars drawn on the whiteboard by the teacher were accidentally boob-shaped, after sorting that out he finished the lesson by saying: I'll give you a copy so you can play with it later... [unfortunate choice of words..]
* Dynamic is like ME: 'Doing something'
* Groundspoilers are made to work on the ground [teacher finds this so obvious that he puts it in the pillory]
*That sodding Air-France crew were manually flying it.. and they were only cruise pilots.. the captain was in the back getting a blow job, or maybe in the front or whatever..
*Teacher started a sentence, but realized he'd been using wrong words.... 'So, you then reach for the switch lights on the dashboard from which.... uhum, I mean, instrument panel'
*Humidity inside a pressurized aircraft, especially on short-haul, is kept very low in order to not having to transport lots of water inside the aircraft. Instead of humidifying an aircraft, drinks are given to the passengers. The teacher followed saying 'We give them loads of salted peanuts first, then give them drinks to satisfy their needs, no one will even notice the low humidity'.
*Talking about pilots' tasks, pilots' workloads are reduced by automation of systems such as air conditioning. He then said: 'you pilots got sudoku to do, so recirculation is done automatically'.
*In an emergency, the rubber jungle will come down (referring to the oxygen-masks)
*Next to you you'll have a couple of pencils, you use it to stab your leg with every half an hour.. otherwise it'll fall asleep, due to your huge wallet in your back pocket cutting off the blood supply to your leg.
*Chances of getting an engine failure on modern high speed jet transport aircraft are very rare, i'd probably get Angelina Jolie first.
*In Goose Bay [Canada] the temperature is minus ridiculous sometimes
*This is a sidestick, always difficult to draw one without it looking like a willy..
*If you can not manage to save the airplane after a fault which you could be held responsible for, then the very last thing you'd say on the flight deck voice recorder before you crash is: 'Who let that goat in here'? That'll get them thinking.
If I saw a hang glider I'd go as fast as I could so the wake turbulence would stall the bastard. And as he was falling, light the afterburners, set fire to the evidence.. Always light the burners, it looks impressive!

3) Fav. uitspraken studenten OAA

* Haha, heb die die troep gekocht! [basics-lasagna] kochten wij in het begin ook, is niet te vreten
* Sir, the computer is asking me funny questions
* Je moet wel veel begrijpen voordat je het snapt..
* Anybody got any questions regarding the Principles of Flight test? *Jes, what is wing growth? (it's not a POF question.. The teacher did answer it though)
* Question at human-performance: 'Flight from London to New-York, where are you going to divert to if the weather is bad?' Answer given by a student: 'Hawaii'   HAHA